Lessons I Learned In My Youth

"Growing the perfect sunflower is not as easy as it looks."  This is something my grandmother told me when I was 12, as she painted a picture of 2 children playing in a field of sunflowers for a Sunday school lesson.  I remember that day well, as she explained the loyalty the sunflower has for the sun, following it everywhere it goes.  It is one of many odd things I learned as I made my way through childhood.  It is something I will never forget.  Every time I see a sunflower I think of that painting.  I can see it as clear as day, like it just happened this morning and not 26 years ago.


 It's funny the things we retain from our childhood.  Useless information that crops up out of nowhere to haunt us, but really serves no purpose.  Like the fact that a widow's peak is a recessive trait, or that snowflakes have six sides.  I say that these things are useless only because they aren't really needed to function in every day life.  I mean really, when the fuck do I, ApparentlyATotalB, need to know how many sides a snowflake has?  Seriously.  When?  Why the hell do I know that?  Why?  WHY?!?  Why do I care that sunflowers are loyal to the sun?  Why?  And as far as recessive and dominant traits go, I am not a Geneticist, nor do I aspire to be one.  And yet, I carry around information about traits that are really useless to little old me.  


Now, just because I find this information useless, doesn't mean I don't find it interesting.  I am quite glad I know how to make chains out of clover, make friendship bracelets out of embroidery floss, and suck the nectar out of honeysuckle.  I am grateful to have learned how to blow an egg and press flowers.  I am very proud of the fact that I know the difference between a French braid and a regular braid and can do both.  Why you ask?  Well, I will tell you why.  Because my kids think I am fucking MAGIC!!!  I am a GENIUS!  They actually believe I am some all knowing godDESS!  When Mommy knows something special and different, it leaves them in awe.  I fucking LOVE IT!!


Now, I know what you're thinking.  That they won't think that forever.  Yes, you are right.  They won't.  Some day, they will understand, as I do, that along the course of life, we pick up meaningless information and pass it along to our kids, who will then pass it to theirs, and so on.  But, for right now, I have the power.  I am the all knowing.  I alone hold the information to get them through.  Me.  Myself.  I.  And I will cherish that time as long as I can.  Because, let's face it.  Not everyone gets to blow up the death star.